It has been a week since my grandmother was rushed into the hospital. She had a mild stroke early Tuesday morning, June 26. We thought it can be reversed, little did we know she will be struggling over other complications brought about by a single factor: Diabetes.

Since then, she is suffering from cysts found in her uterus, respiratory ailments (low oxygen rate and phlegm in her lungs), sepsis or blood poisoning, her abnormal blood sugar rate, and kidney failure. Her wounds would not heal because of diabetes, which continues to spread in her entire system. She was also refusing to eat her food that adds to her constant weakening body. And sadly, as what the doctors told my father, only a miracle will save her at this point.

My grandmother is not the nicest person in the world but given her condition, of course I can't help sympathize over her. For a week, I have been tending to my other grandmother, Papong, to at least drift her away from the reality her daughter's in the hospital. We would not want to lose both of them at the same time either.

Around 4 or 5 this afternoon, I was playing with my make up when my father came home from the hospital. I went inside my parents' room and saw him. He complimented my make up, calling me beautiful but then he burst into tears. It was the first time I saw him crying in front of me and my tears fell as well, ruining my painted face. "Anak, pagdasal natin lola mo. Delikado na siya.", he sobbed. I hugged him and was rubbing his back as he cried. He could not have the heart to tell Papong about the situation. Every time Papong asks him, he walks away. It was heartbreaking to see but that's the best thing we can do for her now.

My hands feel cold while typing this entry. I have never seen this house as depressing as it is now. My father barely smiles or laughs and Papong seems to be gloomy all the time. My sister, as far as I can see, does not care at all since we were never close to our grandmother but then she should feel concern at the very least. And that annoys me to no end.

I wanted to help them, especially financially but I'm still in the current state of unemployment. I'm already feeling the obligation of being the eldest daughter to be of assistance at will. I could not stand seeing my father so stressed and exhausted since he has hypertension (high blood pressure). All we, perhaps I, can do now is pray for strength to overcome this situation and guidance for everything and everyone else. To God, be the Glory.

Labels: family