So here I am, practically back to where my unexpressed thoughts were vented out. What brings me back here was a blog entry of a friend and with that, I sort of missed blogging too.

Anyway at the present page, I’m in the midst of a level 5 bipolarity. I get these mixed signals from my scumbag brain. I dwell with this unnecessary anxieties that are difficult to handle. I’m being awfully rude to the people I love most. And they were brought up by my crazy bipolar self yet again.

Sometimes just when you thought everything was going your way like, it’s one of the happiest and most carefree part of your life, something must happen to screw things up. Just when you thought you feel all the good vibes in you, something must happen to prove you wrong. That there are tons of stuff to worry about, most of them keep you busy and drives you crazy and gives you something to do when in fact, you can just simply let them go and you’re back to being normal. But hell no, that’s not how life simply rocks. This shit throws lemons at you at your blind spot. It attacks you when you’re off guard. When you’re not prepared to face your greatest fears because you thought things were going so well in your life. And just like that, you’re frozen. You let these flow of negativity get the best of you and you’re done. And those possible investments you made with all those greatness and positive attitude are simply.. gone. Like they never were in the first place.

And you’re back to stage 1: pulling yourself together. How to cope with all these stressful things occurred in your almost perfect life. How to turn things around. How to load your best save state. How to do this and that. How to get back to your normal self and forget everything else that makes your life upset.

They call me witch for some reasons. But even witches have their own Kryptonite. And I haven’t gotten rid of mine yet. I hope I will in the soonest time possible before it actually eats me alive.

Labels: rants