"Soon it unfolds who we are in this masquerade of
stars."
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"Soon it unfolds who we are in this masquerade of
stars."
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Oh-Ghost |
Please be informed this may be another rant post. I think I already turned this online journal into a rant blog haaaaa.
Apparently, August just ended, which means hello ber-months!
I met my High School friends earlier to celebrate M's birthday at Moonleaf and at Classic Savory somewhere in Antipolo. It was fun to see them every once in a while to enjoy our kulitan moments. And being the paparazzi M and S ever were, we also heard some of the latest and prolly the juiciest chismax of the year! Loljk. Chismisan at its best.
Sad to say, ever since we graduated from HS, we rarely hang out with complete members. Then through the years, we got used seeing just the 5 of our faces every time we get together. 'Yan tayo eh, reach out reach out din 'pag may time para kumpleto. But noooooo, little did we know, bridges were already burned.
Communication has always been a two-way process. Once the other party lost connection, you wouldn't be able to reach them. Kahit sa ibabaw ka pa ng Mt. Everest maghanap ng signal, kung ayaw ka nila kausapin, edi wala. :D
So allow me to take this moment and sulk in sadness as I (or we) realized that, well, obviously we lost a friend. Not that it's said verbally, but it's something we've all felt for quite some time. I have to admit my heart sunk deep because we've always been partners in class, copied each other's answers, burned the telephone lines from telebabad nights, shared darkest secrets, and more. I remember the retreat letter you gave to me when we were in 4th year. You placed big and small ribbons on top of the letters which indicate how close you are to the recipient. Mine was a big ribbon. :)
We were close friends. Maybe even best friends if you consider it that way. I don't mind.
Maybe I'm just being silly and overthinking. Baka nagaassume lang pala ako and it's not what I think it is pala. Then again, maybe you're already a ghost of my past. See how many "maybes" I said? I'm that unceratin haha.
But at the end of the day, people still change.Change is the only constant thing in this universe.
Despite all that, I will try my best not to hold any grudges. I still hope one day you will realize we will always be here if you changed your mind.
~
K, I wish you and your baby, if we are not mistaken, well and healthy.
Labels: blacksheeps, friends, rants Wooooo!! |
So umm..
This is undeniably, ultimately,
beyond reasonable doubt,
the most accurate summary
of my current situation.
Yes, it is quite depressing.
Yes, the emotions consume me.
But no, I am not giving up.
Not this time.
Because yes, my old friend,
I have the most amazing,
wonderful and ever supportive--
the best circle of crazily loyal friends.
Having them around,
despite the time and distance,
we surely find a way,
to reach out and stay connected.
And with that, my old friend,
even without money and a honey,
which I know are on their ways,
I must say dearly,
that I am truly blessed
with these simple treasures,
I would love to call
FRIENDS. :)
Labels: blacksheeps, gg, gif, gpoy, himym, life, lovelife, random, rants, work Gravity |
 I was catching up with a friend through FB and guess what. Late night conversations often dig deeper revelations of your heart's desires. And it's past midnight. We started the conversation with simpler things and slowly though predictable, we ended up talking about her past love. A love she felt first for about 10 years that remains hidden up to this very day.. especially to the person involved. The last time we saw each other, I tried helping her make a decision about her problem by card reading. Still an amateur though, it was sort of a practice for me to make my own interpretations of the cards. Overall there was no need for the cards anymore because just by listening to her story already predicts the solution. The cards served as a guide or a confirmation for us. I told her to stop wasting time and let things go. She agreed firmly. As much as possible I was trying to lighten things up during our conversation, not because I was not in the mood to have heart-to-heart talks but I did not want to see her or at least feel like she is going back to stage one after all the progress she has been making. I guess I've learned that sometimes despite all the efforts you have been trying to forget this special someone, something always brings you back to them. Whether a chat like this, a place, a food, a song or a book or basically anything that you will find a connection to them. You then feel vulnerable afterwards but what you do about it will impact what's next. Honestly after I finished reading her reply, I also had a quick flashback-slash-summary of my own story. But I didn't let it get to me because I know it will be a waste of time thinking about things used to haunt my sleepless nights like an insect bite. You feel the urge to scratch the itchiness and once you take notice and give in, it will hurt you more and you scratch more and then you will never stop.. until you fight it. And it's crazy comparing love matters with an insect bite lol. Weird mind, I have. Although I thought the same thing. It will be a major achievement when I get to see this person and poof! No more butterflies in my stomach. Not even a breathtaking moment with this dreamy effect and flowers and birds and awkward eye contact and the world stops and it's just the two of you in the moment and you both lean in and oh, I could go on for more. I want that time where a day will be over without the person crossing my mind. And I'm still working on that, sadly. So we made a bet, if they meet this year's Christmas and she feels completely fine, meaning she has moved on, then I will treat her something. Otherwise, she gets mesmerized by him and she will treat me instead. Hohoho. :> BG music while writing this entry: Gravity - Sara Bareilles. Para feel na feel ko 'yung emosyon. Hahaha! Labels: blacksheeps, friends, lovelife |
Info;
Bipolar;
 Archive;
Out of the Blue |
Freedom |
Sparks |
10 years ago |
Oh-Ghost |
Unli |
HoiHoi |
Ultimate |
The Writer |
Highlights of my Twenty Twelve |
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